Not since Thomas Dewey challenged Harry Truman in 1948 has a campaign for the Presidency been conducted on terms so vacuous, so devoid of content, so breathtakingly mundane. In Michigan, Romney waxed long upon the virtues of the trees, opining that they are “just the right height”, and talked about the “lakes”, not just the “Great Lakes, but all the lakes”, without saying precisely why he is so fond of them. In Tennessee he sang the theme song of Davey Crockett. Being a “Boomer”, and an early “Boomer” at that, Romney should know the theme song to the old Disney T.V. show. Davey Crockett in the hands of Walt Disney was all the rage in the mid-1950s. The nation was awash in Crockett T-Shirts and “Coonskin” caps. In fact I had one myself, won in a local Wonder Bread Coloring contest. But Willard fumbled the lyric singing “he killed him a bear when he was only three” Any Baby-Boomer worth his salt knows that the song goes “he kilt him a bar when he was only three”. Willard “Mitt” Romney is campaigning for the Presidency in such a way as to make Thomas Dewey and even old Dubya look like policy wonks.
It gets worse. This week the campaign went abroad in search of photo-ops, headlines and campaign contributions. It quickly became a comedy of errors as the clown from Utah stumbled over himself outraging in the process the Brits, the Palestininians, the Poles and a sizeable chunk of the public back home who are deeply embarrassed for him. First he touched off a mild firestorm on Fleet-Street when the British press took him to task for mildly suggesting that they weren’t ready for the Olympics. British Prime Minister David Cameron openly challenged the challenger by suggesting that it is much easier to organize an Olympics out in ‘the middle of nowhere’ and the London Mayor before a gathering of about 60,000 raised a chorus of cheers by asking the assembled if they were ready. Next it was on to Israel where the club-footed Romney once again stumbled, this time on the rocks of middle-east politics: this time suggesting Israeli cultural superiority over the Palestinians. Then it was on to Poland where an aid cursed the press which was growing tired of simply witnessing the fool walking around to no apparent purpose. Having answered a total of 3 questions from the press pool they were in the words of Gretta Van Susteren the fox newsperson sent to cover the trip, left to feel like animals in a petting zoo. So now Romney has limped back into the states leaving his wife and her horse in London where the beast is set to compete in an Olympic event from which the Candidate has now distanced himself.
However Romney runs, wherever Romney turns, he confronts not Obama, but Romney. In an interview with NBC’s Brian Williams Romney professed not to know much about the horse or the event or even when the event will be held. Telling NBC that the horse belongs to his wife and feigning little interest in it saying that he is too busy to even attend the event whenever it is held, Romney moved to put as much distance between himself and the dancing, prancing equine as politics and physical distance will permit. Under no circumstances will he be photographed watching the beast but, it has been reported, it did not prevent the Vulture Capitalist from declaring the horse as a business deduction to the tune of $70,000 in his only so far publicly released tax form.
This is how one with hundreds of millions of dollars in personal wealth gains admission into the lowest tax bracket in the country.
“Go to the source
And ask the horse
He’ll give you the answer
That you endorse” --Theme Song to the Television Show “Mr. Ed”
But the horse presents problems of a different color for it threatens by simply showing up to overshadow the performance overseas of the candidate himself. Should the horse take a Gold Medal, and win in the process the hearts of the world perhaps Willard will consider not John Bolton as Secretary of State, but the Dancing Horse instead. It would certainly be an improvement for the horse is unlikely to be a neo-con and would certainly, on any given occasion, give you the answer that you endorse.
Romney isn’t the solution, as Obama says, he is the problem. He is the poster boy for how the United States has gone off the rails since that actor from California took office.