“ONE FRY SHORT OF
A HAPPY MEAL”
----Banner
headline on front page of “The Drudge Report”
For those of you too young to remember, or those with
short attention spans or memory, The Drudge Report, founded by
Matt Drudge is one of the first full-blown on-line reactionary
publications to gain national traction. This was during the Clinton
administration and Drudge was to report first, and almost singularly
accurate, the sorry tale of Clinton and his affair with a young White
House staffer named Monica Lewinsky. This gained him instant
gravitas among ReSCUMlicans and others of a decidedly fascist bent.
Drudge also became one of the go-to sources for that fat ass Rush
Limbaugh as he daily snorkeled in the idiot wrong's reactionary
septic system in constant search for material to gag up during his
daily three-hour-long screeds.
So it comes as something of a shock to see Drudge openly
declare what is so obvious to civilized people: tRUMP is a fraud.
For weeks now, Caesar Disgustus has been prancing about
the land, doing the “double-jerk” (you know that dance on stage
where he looks like he is masturbating two men at the same time) and
telling his adoring audiences that Kamala really didn't work at
McDonald's when she was young. The story goes that since she didn't
list her McDonald's employment on her professional resumes, she
couldn't possibly have held such a job. Calling her Lyin' Kamala (he
has lost his powers of creativity here re-using an epithet previously
reserved for Ted Cruz), he has of late vowed to work 'a shift' at
McDonald's in order to demonstrate that the job isn't that hard and,
of course, he can do it better. This is of a pattern for he told the
auto workers that all they do is assemble previously manufactured
parts out of a box and that a child could do it. All this in an
appeal to blue-collar workers.
So this weekend it was put to the full test. Here we
have video of Caesar Disgustus being introduced to the french fry
machine. First he arrives in a suit, complete with his over sized
clown red tie. After removing his jacket, gold cuff links can be
seen on his french cuff dress shirt. He stands and listens as some
poor hapless bastard attempts to explain how the machine works, how
to use the timers and what do do when they go off. Then, donning the
apron, he needs help and another employee, this one female, goes
behind and ties the apron for him. Everyone who has ever worked in a
fast-food joint is now shaking their heads, knowing immediately that
this man is a fish out of water.
Well to make a not so long story short, it was a
complete disaster. The fries he produced were soggy and not
completely cooked. He failed. They transferred him to another job,
this time the take-out window.
But the whole thing was a sham. The entire demonstration
lasted about 15 minutes. Then this morning reports surfaced that the
'store' (McDonald's doesn't have restaurants, it has 'stores') was
closed for four hours in order to hold this event. This event was
populated by maggots, die-hard tRUMPers hell-bent on demonstrating he
is one of the 'people'. He didn't work a 'shift', let alone report
to this job every day, eight hours a day, week in and week out. He
'worked' 15 minutes and even then failed miserably. Not since Mike
Dukkakis climbed in that tank, looking nothing so much as Snoopy
sticking his head out to see where the machine was heading, has a
presidential campaign stunt looked so ridiculous. Hell, it's even
worse than that.
But he got his photo-0p, as they say, and it will fill
the screens of Newsmax and Fox and Sinclair, to the rest of us he was
just another McDonald's clown.
The media and the country are finally, after nearly a
decade, getting wise to all this. As reported previously in these
columns Cory Lewandowski, tRUMP's first campaign manager in 2016,
admitted that the campaign had hired the audience in attendance at
tRUMP Tower when he came down the escalator and announced that
henceforth he would stink up the public forum. They used a New York
talent agency to recruit his 'supporters' so that an illusion of
popular demand could be created out of whole cloth.
More recently, the campaign has put “Fire Fighters for
Trump” T-shirts and signs on the persons and in the hands of
'supporters' who aren't firefighters; “Union Workers for Trump”
signs and T-Shirts on those who are not union workers; white people
in a black church so that Disgustus can argue he appears to speak in
black churches; in a move reminiscent of the Florida “Brooks
Brothers Riot” in the aftermath of the 2000 election he is now
choreographing people posing as blue collar workers who in fact are
congressional staffers. One notable participant was a black man who
worked in the office of the now thoroughly disgraced and convicted
felon former Congressman George Santos.
TRUMP, it should have long since become apparent, is a
thoroughgoing fraud. Everything about the man is fraudulent. His
businesses, his family life, his political 'ideology'. It is all
blue smoke and mirrors, all grandiose pretension. Fantasy become
reality; you know, a reality show. And, oh yes, that “reality”
show The Apprentice, the one that made tRUMP what he is today?
That too was staged and scripted.
And what a miserable show it is. Here, at “Mickey
D's” fantasy fails reality as our would be Caesar demonstrates
beyond all doubt that his incompetence is so complete that even after
they reportedly rehearsed this with him, he could not even rustle up
a decent serving of french fries. Perhaps it was the 'serving' that
did him in. Perhaps it is that for the first time in his life he is
actually, if incompetently 'serving' someone. Or at least the
prospect was in the offing.
Forcing himself to actually 'serve' someone. He
couldn't bring himself to do that.
Imprison the bastard.